Medical Quotes

"There aren't any syringes."Red Sox came over and held a sterile pack out. When she tried to take it from him, he kept a grip on the thing. "I know you'll use this wisely.""Wisely?"She snapped the syringe out of his hand. "No, I'm going to poke him in the eye with it. Because that's what they trained me to do in medical school."

J.R. Ward

"In my opinion, our health care system has failed when a doctor fails to treat an illness that is treatable."

Kevin Alan Lee

"You cannot separate passion from pathology any more than you can separate a person's spirit from his body."

Richard Selzer

"There wasn't an anhydrous lacrimal gland in the room..."

Mary Roach

"If we don't change, millions of American families are just one medical emergency, or one layoff, away from financial disaster and bankruptcy."

Jim Cooper

"When I took command in Vietnam, I gave great emphasis to food and medical care - and to the mail."

William Westmoreland

"In my second year, after moving to the Medical School, I began the courses of Anatomy and Physiology. I had begun to see that I was interested in cells and their functions."

Sydney Brenner

"As a player, I was fortunate to work with coaching and medical staffs that underscored the importance of utilizing injury prevention exercises, which contributed to my healthy and long playing career."

Cobi Jones

"For my convalescence, I had to exercise my voice only with vowels. It is a medical rule after a long loss of voice."

Nana Mouskouri

"When I was born in 1970 with a rare genetic disorder called spondyloepiphyseal dysplasia congenita (SED), medical science wasn't what it is today and my mum and dad were treated terribly by the medical profession."

Warwick Davis

"Developments in medical technology have long been confined to procedural or pharmaceutical advances, while neglecting a most basic and essential component of medicine: patient information management."

John Doolittle

"The Navy's paid for you to go through school, and then they need doctors to go out and take care of people who are in various different parts of the world. I decided to pay back my time first as an undersea medical officer. I was stationed in Scotland."

Laurel Clark

"Only medical hypnosis is capable of opening up amnesia."

Betty Hill

"Today we see a human population of over 6 billion people, many of whom have serious medical conditions, which either can't be treated or cannot be treated economically."

Ralph Merkle

"Doctors coin money when they do procedures but family medicine doesn't have any procedures."

David Jones

"I was going to have cosmetic surgery until I noticed that the doctor's office was full of portraits by Picasso."

Rita Rudner

"I'm not feeling very well - I need a doctor immediately. Ring the nearest golf course."

Groucho Marx

"They certainly give very strange names to diseases."

Plato

"Getting out of the hospital is a lot like resigning from a book club. You're not out of it until the computer says you're out of it."

Erma Bombeck

"Medicine is my lawful wife and literature my mistress when I get tired of one, I spend the night with the other."

Anton Chekhov

"When I was born I was so ugly the doctor slapped my mother."

Rodney Dangerfield

"Doctors are just the same as lawyers the only difference is that lawyers merely rob you, whereas doctors rob you and kill you too."

Anton Chekhov

"The doctor sees all the weakness of mankind the lawyer all the wickedness, the theologian all the stupidity."

Arthur Schopenhauer

"Doctors will have more lives to answer for in the next world than even we generals."

Napoleon Bonaparte

"All sorts of computer errors are now turning up. You'd be surprised to know the number of doctors who claim they are treating pregnant men."

Isaac Asimov

"Illness is the doctor to whom we pay most heed to kindness, to knowledge, we make promise only pain we obey."

Marcel Proust

"Three-quarters of the sicknesses of intelligent people come from their intelligence. They need at least a doctor who can understand this sickness."

Marcel Proust

"A physician's physiology has much the same relation to his power of healing as a cleric's divinity has to his power of influencing conduct."

Samuel Butler

"You may not be able to read a doctor's handwriting and prescription, but you'll notice his bills are neatly typewritten."

Earl Wilson

"Modern medicine is a negation of health. It isn't organized to serve human health, but only itself, as an institution. It makes more people sick than it heals."

Ivan Illich

"Whenever a doctor cannot do good, he must be kept from doing harm."

Hippocrates

"The best doctor is the one you run to and can't find."

Denis Diderot

"Time is generally the best doctor."

Ovid

"My doctor gave me six months to live, but when I couldn't pay the bill he gave me six months more."

Walter Matthau

"When I told my doctor I couldn't afford an operation, he offered to touch-up my X-rays."

Henny Youngman

"The great secret of doctors, known only to their wives, but still hidden from the public, is that most things get better by themselves most things, in fact, are better in the morning."

Lewis Thomas

"Medicine sometimes snatches away health, sometimes gives it."

Ovid

"I was always shocked when I went to the doctor's office and they did my X-ray and didn't find that I had eight more ribs than I should have or that my blood was the color green."

Nicolas Cage

"I'm 86 and my doctor used to tell me to slow down - at least he did until he dropped dead."

Cesar Romero

"Some people think that doctors and nurses can put scrambled eggs back in the shell."

Cass Canfield

"You can die of the cure before you die of the illness."

Michael Landon

"People are so afraid of authority figures and doctors are authority figures."

Martha Beck

"The physician's highest calling, his only calling, is to make sick people healthy - to heal, as it is termed."

Samuel Hahnemann

"It is reasonable to expect the doctor to recognize that science may not have all the answers to problems of health and healing."

Norman Cousins

"Growing up, my dolls were doctors and on secret missions. I had Barbie Goes Rambo."

Zoe Saldana

"When a man goes through six years training to be a doctor he will never be the same. He knows too much."

Enid Bagnold

"Flying back from New York, the flight attendant said 'God, I wished you were here yesterday, we had a stroke on the plane. I said, if I have a stroke on a plane, I hope the pretend doctor isn't the one on the plane. I want a real doctor."

Anthony Edwards

"America has the best doctors, the best nurses, the best hospitals, the best medical technology, the best medical breakthrough medicines in the world. There is absolutely no reason we should not have in this country the best health care in the world."

Bill Frist

"I'm strongly for a patient Bill of Rights. Decisions ought to be made by doctors, not accountants."

Charles Schumer

"I'm by no means condemning prescription medicine for mental health. I've seen it save a lot of people's lives."

Zach Braff

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