“They could have gotten help for this infertility but they believed that interfering with the reproductive process, even if it was faulty, was anti-God. It was against His plan. It never occurred to them that God may have provided the world with a vast array of very brainy medical types for the very reason of solving problems such as theirs. However, there is one thing that the medical profession cannot do and that is save people from being idiots.”
“I realized women and humor were linked very closely.”
Craig Ferguson
“I think when you become a parent you go from being a star in the movie of your own life to the supporting player in the movie of someone else's.”
Craig Ferguson
“He will know from and early age that failure is not disgrace. It's just a pitch that you missed, and you'd better get ready for the next one. The next one might be the shot heard round the world. My s...”
Craig Ferguson
“I don’t think there’s anything wrong with telling the truth. I know it isn’t fashionable.”
Craig Ferguson
“Twas the night before Thanksgiving. All the food's in the oven. And I'm in the bedroom performin' self lovin'.”
Craig Ferguson