Terry Pratchett
216 quotes
Biography
"The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it."
"It is often said that before you die your life passes before your eyes. It is in fact true. It's called living."
"Some humans would do anything to see if it was possible to do it. If you put a large switch in some cave somewhere, with a sign on it saying 'End-of-the-World Switch. PLEASE DO NOT TOUCH', the paint wouldn't even have time to dry."
"It is said that your life flashes before your eyes just before you die. That is true, it's called Life."
"Stories of imagination tend to upset those without one."
"If cats looked like frogs we'd realize what nasty, cruel little bastards they are. Style. That's what people remember."
"Why do you go away? So that you can come back. So that you can see the place you came from with new eyes and extra colors. And the people there see you differently, too. Coming back to where you started is not the same as never leaving."
"In ancient times cats were worshipped as gods; they have not forgotten this."
"Time is a drug. Too much of it kills you."
"Wisdom comes from experience. Experience is often a result of lack of wisdom."
"In the beginning there was nothing, which exploded."
"It's not worth doing something unless someone, somewhere, would much rather you weren't doing it."
"I meant,"said Ipslore bitterly, "what is there in this world that truly makes living worthwhile?"Death thought about it.CATS, he said eventually. CATS ARE NICE."
"Light thinks it travels faster than anything but it is wrong. No matter how fast light travels, it finds the darkness has always got there first, and is waiting for it."
"DON'T THINK OF IT AS DYING, said Death. JUST THINK OF IT AS LEAVING EARLY TO AVOID THE RUSH."
"If you have enough book space, I don't want to talk to you."
"Five exclamation marks, the sure sign of an insane mind."
"I'll be more enthusiastic about encouraging thinking outside the box when there's evidence of any thinking going on inside it."
"God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffable game of His own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players [i.e. everybody], to being involved in an obscure and complex variant of poker in a pitch-dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a Dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time."
"And what would humans be without love?"RARE, said Death."
"No! Please! I'll tell you whatever you want to know!"the man yelled. "Really?"said Vimes. "What's the orbital velocity of the moon?""What?""Oh, you'd like something simpler?"
"I'd rather be a rising ape than a falling angel."
"The whole of life is just like watching a film. Only it's as though you always get in ten minutes after the big picture has started, and no-one will tell you the plot, so you have to work it out all yourself from the clues."
"If complete and utter chaos was lightning, then he'd be the sort to stand on a hilltop in a thunderstorm wearing wet copper armour and shouting 'All gods are bastards!"
"Getting an education was a bit like a communicable sexual disease. It made you unsuitable for a lot of jobs and then you had the urge to pass it on."