J. Richard Singleton

11 quotes

"If there's one thing I know about women, it's that they have vaginas."

J. Richard Singleton

"You can't make a woman love you. Not even with duct tape."

J. Richard Singleton

"No man wants his daughter to be the kind of girl whom he liked in high school."

J. Richard Singleton

"I try not to let other people's problems problem me."

J. Richard Singleton

"I love animals, especially with barbeque sauce."

J. Richard Singleton

"Life.... It's better than the alternative."

J. Richard Singleton

"You have to think if we've been visited by extraterrestrial life, it was like a zookeeper walking into the chimp enclosure: He looks around, takes some pictures, then leaves without interacting significantly with the environment. Meanwhile the chimps have no idea what the fuck just happened."

J. Richard Singleton

"The truth is like sunlight: It causes cancer."

J. Richard Singleton

"I love Las Vegas because it's the one city less classy than Los Angeles."

J. Richard Singleton

"Los Angeles is a city made up of refugees from better cities."

J. Richard Singleton

"That's crazier than a boatload of prostitutes!"

J. Richard Singleton